In the last two MUSELETTERS I shared about a special offering we’ve been carefully developing behind the scenes. Today, I’m excited to finally open the curtain and share the first pioneering case study that has emerged from this work.
The story of Jonathan, Nina, and Mae is not just personal – it’s a living example of what becomes possible when we dare to explore sexuality as a path to wholeness. Their journey is both tender and revolutionary, and it now forms the heart of a book I am writing on “Sexual Fantasies as Path to Wholeness.” In the book, you will also be able to read Jonathan'‘s, Nina’s, and Mae’s experiences in their own words.
For those of you who feel the call to walk a similar path and work with us in this way, know that this is still an experiment in progress. We are learning by doing. Mistakes are part of the journey, and we are deeply grateful to all the brave and edgy souls who feel drawn to co-create a new culture of relating with us.
With this spirit of honesty, exploration, and courage, I invite you into the first chapter of this unfolding story:
Meeting the SEXplorer – A Journey from Fantasy to Fullness
When Jonathan first came to me about a year ago, he carried a quiet yet urgent longing: to fully get to know and feel his complete sexual spectrum. After surviving a severe bike accident some years earlier, he found himself asking the bigger questions in life – among them: What is it that I still want to experience before I die? The answer was unflinchingly clear to him: to meet myself fully, sexually.
Jonathan had lived most of his life as what one might call “Mister Nice Guy” – the beloved neighbor who’s always ready to help, the loyal husband, the devoted father of three. A man with a successful career who channeled much of his creative life force into professional achievements. Sexually, however, he had remained largely shy and unexplored. Raised within a strong Protestant framework, pleasure was long associated with guilt, indulgence with sin. The unspoken family values were clear: Work hard, stay decent, and happiness will follow. In this framework, Jonathan’s inner SEXplorer – the part of him longing to play, to desire, to express his erotic truth – was never given a seat at the table. In fact, it had been disowned for decades.
In our first sessions together, we began gently meeting the constellation of inner parts that lived within him. Using Voice Dialogue, we explored his inner landscape: the loyal father, the provider, the creative professional, the fearful boy, the inner critic, and, most importantly, the tentative whisper of a new part – his SEXplorer. This was the part of him that held his erotic aliveness, that craved intensity, spontaneity, and embodied pleasure. It had been hidden in the shadow for so long that it emerged at first only in glimpses – in fantasies.
Fantasies became our gateway.
In a safe and shame-free space, Jonathan began to share his erotic imagination – his longings, his desires, the scenes that lived in him. Rather than analyzing or suppressing them, we invited them in. Bit by bit, we turned up the ‘volume’ of these inner films, allowing Jonathan’s SEXplorer to take shape and become a character with a voice and a role. And remarkably, Jonathan dared to share these fantasies with his wife, Nina.
That moment marked a turning point – and the beginning of a deeper transformation.
As a relationship facilitator, I’ve learned this truth: we can’t fully welcome a disowned part of ourselves into life without also tending to how it lands in the relationship system we live in. So when Jonathan began connecting with his erotic self, I knew that we needed to invite Nina into the process. At first, she was hesitant – understandably so. Her system, built on safety, love, and commitment, was deeply threatened by the unknown of Jonathan’s sexual unfolding. Would she still be enough? Would she be replaced?
These are not minor fears – they are primal wounds that many women (and men) carry, often unspoken.
After some resistance, Nina agreed to come in. We began a deep journey together that eventually took us to Portugal for an immersive retreat. There, I dedicated time to truly meet Nina’s inner world. We used Voice Dialogue to explore her own parts: the vigilant protector, the wounded inner child, the wise woman, the lover, the critic. We identified her core vulnerability: the fear of not being enough. Her system needed space, breath, and tools to regulate – to feel, but not drown in, her emotions.
In relationships, especially long-term ones, differing sexual blueprints often become the source of tension. A sexual blueprint, a concept coined by Jaiya, is a way to describe someone’s erotic language – how they are wired to give and receive pleasure. Jaiya’s five types include the Energetic, Sensual, Sexual, Kinky, and Shapeshifter blueprints. Most people carry a mix, but usually one or two dominate.
Jonathan and Nina had different sexual blueprints. Their primary parts connected well around family life, shared values, and emotional closeness. But now, Jonathan wanted to explore a disowned part – the sexual adventurer, the passionate lover – and that caused natural friction. This is where many couples drift apart. One partner suppresses, the other cheats, and the relationship frays in silence. We've seen it on screens and lived it in silence. But we rarely witness healthy models of authentic, erotic evolution within relationships.
That’s the work we’re called to do now – to build a new culture of relating where we model honesty and integrity for ourselves and our children. And that process can never be rushed.
The most important lesson I teach is this: you cannot bypass the process. You can only move as fast as your slowest part allows. In Nina’s case, her nervous system needed time. We didn’t jump into action. Instead, we carefully worked with every emotion, breath by breath. We learned to feel everything – including the discomfort. Stretching, just like in yoga, must be slow and intentional. If you overstretch, you trigger pain. But if you go slowly, with care and compassion, you find new depths you didn’t know existed.
And slowly, we began to stretch.
Through fantasies, through sharing, through grounding, Nina’s system began to regulate. She no longer felt overwhelmed by Jonathan’s desires – she felt curious. She found strength in her capacity to stay with herself even as her partner explored new territory.
Only after I felt that Nina was deeply anchored – not pretending to be okay, but truly grounded – did I bring up the idea of a curated SEXploration for Jonathan. Rather than pushing him into sex-positive events, which felt too unstructured and unsafe for his still-fragile sexual part, I suggested a professional bodyworker. Someone trained in Slow Sex and Tantric practices, who could guide Jonathan into an embodied erotic experience while keeping the heart open and the system safe.
Together – the three of us – we prepared this exploration. We clarified boundaries, checked for blind spots, and explored potential triggers. Because I knew Nina’s inner landscape so intimately, I could name the questions her vulnerable parts might ask – before they even arose. We created a container that held not only Jonathan’s longing but also Nina’s heart. I then checked in with Mae, the bodyworker, and together we co-created a session that honored both Jonathan’s desire and Nina’s integrity.
This is sacred work.
The core relationship is holy. My role is never to break a bond but to expand it, stretch it lovingly into a shape that can hold more truth, more freedom, and more intimacy. This is perhaps the hardest part of my job – knowing how and when to stretch. Because transformation that honors the past while inviting the future requires precise care.
Jonathan’s date with Mae was not just a sexual encounter – it was a rite of passage. The SEXplorer who once lived only in shadow now danced freely in light. He was met, mirrored, and loved in his erotic essence. And when he returned to Nina, something profound happened: their connection deepened. Their love became more spacious. Their intimacy, more alive.
What makes this journey even more powerful is that it is not just told through my eyes. Jonathan, Nina, and Mae have each written their own stories of this revolutionary SEXploration. In their own words, they open the door into their personal experience – raw, tender, and honest. It is rare to witness such vulnerability shared so openly, and I want to pause here to celebrate their immense courage. To write from the heart about sexuality, about fear and longing, about the intimate layers of relating, is an act of profound bravery. By doing so, they are not only healing themselves but also offering a gift to all of us: a living testimony that transformation is possible when we dare to meet life fully.
And I want to honor one more pioneer in this journey: Mae.
Her role was not “just” that of a sex worker, but of a conscious, embodied guide who lives her work in full honesty and connection with her own body. Mae would never cross her own boundaries or step into something that doesn’t feel right in her system. This makes her work not only safe but profoundly authentic.
This way of practicing sex work – fine-tuned, consensual, trauma-informed, and holistic – is revolutionary. It redefines what erotic service can mean in our culture. It is not only about the client’s liberation but also about the empowerment of the worker herself. In this field, nothing is extracted or imposed. Instead, what happens is a co-created, living dialogue of bodies, hearts, and souls.
Only when it feels right for everyone involved – the client, the partner, and the practitioner – can SEXploration become truly healing. Only then can it ripple outward in a positive way, deepening intimacy in relationships, expanding freedom in individuals, and elevating the way we as a culture view sexuality and sex work itself.
The journey of Jonathan, Nina, and Mae shows what becomes possible when sexuality is embraced as a path of truth and transformation. Yet this revolution does not belong to them alone — it is calling many of us, especially women, to step forward and claim our place as pioneers of a new culture of love and erotic power.
With this spirit, we now open The Path of the Sacred Sex Witch — a training for women ready to walk this path together.
Our Vision
This training is for women who feel called to be pioneers of their time — women ready to explore intimacy, sexuality, and embodiment as a force for transformation. Together we will create depth, courage, and empowerment. This is more than a training — it is the beginning of a sexy revolution we will ignite side by side.
Taster Day – Sunday, November 30
We warmly invite you to an intensive training day in a beautiful space in or around Amsterdam (final location will be confirmed soon).
Facilitated by Anneke (senior facilitator) and Katjalisa (founder of the Slow Sex Movement), the day will include:
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Morning: Introduction to Voice Dialogue and Forum work — therapeutic methodologies that form the foundation of our journey.
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Shared organic lunch
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Afternoon: Embodiment practices inspired by the themes that arise in the morning’s work.
You will get a real taste of the depth and transformation we are here to create together.
6-Month Hybrid Training
If you feel inspired to go further, you can step into a 6-month transformational journey with us. This includes:
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4 x 2-hour online sessions
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Telegram group for heart shares, inspiration, and even sexual fantasies in between
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3-day immersion at a beautiful farm near Amsterdam, Friday April 17 – Sunday April 19
For those who feel the deeper calling to become a sacred sex witch, we will offer an additional training day with practical and legal guidance on sacred sex work.
Investment
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Taster Day, November 30: Sliding scale €255 – €295
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Hybrid Training (online & in-person in April): €1100 – €1300
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Payment in installments is possible
Join the Sexy Revolution
This journey is for women who know they are pioneers, ready to break taboos and step into a new paradigm of embodied feminine power. Together, we are at the beginning of something truly extraordinary — and we cannot wait to start this revolution with you.
If you feel the spark to join the taster day, just get back to us through email and we'll book you in. You can decide after this if you want to join the training or sign-up for that straight away.
